He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize