Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
