Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
