Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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