Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Randomize
