bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
