sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
