Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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