I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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