Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
