is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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