We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
