i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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