So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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