Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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