Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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