DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
