She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
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and i looked up. we had an audience...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
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I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
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