I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
zippers are such a cool invention
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
