absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
