Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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