RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
