How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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