Do you still have your period?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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