Pappa wants mamma naked
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
