My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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