Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
