I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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