morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
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