it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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