Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
