I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I have post one night stand depression
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