My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
