...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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