She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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