I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
