found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
