I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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