I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
