matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
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Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
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I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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