Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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