Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
