You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
