I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
