can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
