Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
