Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
