Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(