would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize