so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
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