need another drink. this is the easiest way
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize