he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
