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• (650): View more from California

  Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  those are such fre$h shoes

  (1-508): View more from Massachusetts

  going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign

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• (641): View more from Iowa

  Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.

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• (510): View more from California

  you told grandpa to call you daddy

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• 

  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.

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• (+91): View more from India

  I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.

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• (772): View more from Florida

  You took a bar mat shot.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.

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• 

  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him

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• (817): View more from Texas

  there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have

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• (323): View more from California

  I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I think he's an actor

  (512): View more from Texas

  That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner

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