Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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